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Wikipedia got it right. “Betrayal is the breaking or violation of a presumptive contract, trust, or confidence that produces moral and psychological conflict within a relationship amongst individuals”.

“A complete break from previously decided upon or presumed norms by one party from the others”.

I haven’t felt this hurt in a while, it’s a very particular type of pain. I feel it seething through my fibers and through my mind. I didn’t think this type of behavior would be directed towards me. I thought the people allowed into my life would not harm me in such a grotesque way, as to make me question every single thing I stood for. I was betrayed.

You chose to dig down to the bottom of the barrel and rip out the remaining shreds of dignity that held your poor little soul together. Unfortunately those shreds have been dissolved. And not by me, but by your choices.

In what world would reaching out to my best friend be okay.

In what dimension did you come to this conclusion.

Your pathetic choices, on multiple occasions has brought me so much shame.

Not just on questioning my own character, in the hopes of believing that I was mistaken to care for you, but in questioning your decency. The common decency as a human being to avoid the most ingrained rule in our species. Not to betray those who you love.

Apparently that life lesson was lost on you. You’ve decided to go behind my back, the one who held you on numerous occasions through your shit, and try to connect with my friend of 13 years, without my knowledge. You took advantage of her. Manipulated her in the same way you do to other kind people in this world.

Your sickness is making me beyond livid. The words fail me now because my anger is at the highest level I could imagine it being towards a person I used to love.

Your actions must stick to you like a cancerous skin tag following you to the depths of your being. I hope that you are able to sleep at night, knowing that your malicious intentions have made you who you are.

This is my final cue from you. One that is beyond anything I would’ve imagined, but this is you. This is not me.

I would never do what you did.

Just know that.

And ask yourself why, why am I like this?

Because I don’t know the answer. But I do know you will never get the privilege of stepping into my life again. In any form or manner. To the next person you date, I’ll pray for them to see you for who you really are. It took me a bit too long.

Lucky for you.

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